selfish (i wished you hated me)

Demxntia

drown me in despair

i’m broken

way beyond repair

from sulking

over the times that we’d never get back

drunk every night with a cigarette pack

but it’s only fair

that i’m broken

way beyond repair

i know that

it’s all my fault, i’m guilty as charged

i’d end it all but that’s not what you want

so it’s hard to bear

cuz i know you still care

but i wished you hated me

as much as you tried to

but you’d never hate

me as much as i do

and my only fear for

when i’m no longer here

is that you’ll find someone else

who’ll deserve all your tears

and i know that sounds selfish

but i just can’t help it

been well prepared

to go now

i’ll be somewhere

you know how

i tend to leave all the ones that i love

just to pretend like i won’t give a ****

to see what we built

become a ghost town

swallowed by guilt, like my pills

i’ve broken down

every night, i go through withdrawals

but it’s only right for all of my wrongs

it’d be easier to bear

if you never cared

i wished you hated me

as much as you tried to

but you’d never hate

me as much as i do

and my only fear for

when i’m no longer here

is that you’ll find someone else

who deserve all your tears

and i know that sounds selfish

but i just can’t help it

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